Tips for first time mothers

Motherhood is an important milestone in a woman’s life. On Mother’s Day, we highlight some of the challenges that new mothers have faced on this exciting journey

Eisha Sarkar Posted On Times Wellness Sunday, May 10, 2009

Of all the challenges that a woman faces in her life, the process of becoming a mother the first time is the most thrilling as well as daunting. Motherhood is a great learning experience. The to-be mom reads, surfs the Internet, debates in chat rooms and joins classes for her kind. As her life balances precariously on the knife-edge, she experiences joys and pains like never before. Here's what goes through her mind:

“What should I eat?”

Roohi Mehta, who gave birth to a bonny baby boy in 2007, is frustrated with the number of tips she gets from well-wishers. "Health issues during first time pregnancy, however trivial, assume grand proportions since everyone around you - your mother, mother-in-law neighbours, office colleagues and even your maid - gives you advice on how you deal with them."

Mehta decided to make her life simpler. "I read books and subscribed to www.babycenter.com. I decided to go for a balanced approach. I did follow a few tips my mother suggested such as not wearing heels, eating less spicy food and avoiding pineapples but the rest I judged for myself."

Dr Rishma Dhillon-Pai, consultant gynaecologist at Jaslok and Lilavati hospitals says, "Science cannot explain some of the things we've been following for centuries. If people tell you to eat only certain foods, there may be some logic. Avoiding 'hot fruits' such as mangoes and pineapples may sound absurd but it may actually work for some women. The same with gond ka laddoo. If you follow diet tips, you should do so in moderation. Just an additional 300 calories a day (i.e. a glass of milk and an apple) is actually good enough."

"I can't face the pain"

Ekta Bhatnagar, who gave birth to her son in 2006, says she was frightened of a natural delivery. "I couldn't bear the thought of the pain. And thankfully, I didn't undergo labour. I had membrane rupture and all the water had come out so I had an emergency C-section," she says.

"Many women fear the pain associated with natural birthing. People read a lot on the Internet and have preconceived notions about what pregnancy entails. Nowadays natural delivery can be made less painful with the help of epidurals. It's only when they're not completely convinced do I suggest caesarean delivery," says Dr Dhillon-Pai.

"Check the stars"

As if the physiological changes in her body are not enough, it's the time and the configuration of stars that can make the difference whether the baby is healthy or unhealthy, dark or fair, boy or girl. Yes, in 21st-century Mumbai, an increasing number of women opt for planned Caesarean deliveries simply because that's what the stars dictate.

Dr Dhillon-Pai says, "The trend's new - maybe in the last couple of years. Many women ask me to conduct C-sections on a given date at a particular time just because the family pundits believe it to be auspicious. No amount of reasoning or convincing works. Besides, some couples simply go for such deliveries under pressure from their families."

"Is it too late?"

Meghana G hates one remark - "You're three months pregant and you didn't tell us!" Most of the time, Meghana simply responds with just a smile. Sometimes, her patience gives way. "I would have told you had I known myself. I figured I was pregnant one and a half months into pregnancy."

While Meghana's lucky to have found out she's pregnant relatively early, Dr Dhillon-Pai says, "The early detection of pregnancy is absolutely crucial to the development of foetus and the mother's health. I strongly recommend pre-pregnancy counselling to screen for any diseases/disorders that the to-be moms may have such as fibroids in the uterus, thyroid problems and juvenile diabetes. If these are detected after pregnancy, the chances of correction are low or zero."

"How do I protect my baby from infections?"

Falguni Hathi, who's awaiting delivery later this month, is more anxious about how she should protect her newborn from an array of infections. She has already started reading up on 'signs and symptoms new mothers should look out for'.

Dr Meena Malkani, consultant paediatrician at Jaslok Hospital, categorises neonatal infections into two types:

1. The ones that are passed onto the child from the mother such as TB, malaria, vaginal infections (fungal and Herpes), HIV, Toxoplasma, Cytomegalovirus, Rubella and Chicken Pox. These infections are rare and we have to do blood tests on the child to confirm their presence. If the mother has malaria in the second trimester, she may even suffer a miscarriage or the baby born will be very underweight. In case of severe anaemia, the baby might be affected and have very low immunity. If the mother is HIV+, we need to give her drugs and treat her so that she doesn't pass the virus to the child.

2. Infections the baby may contract from the environment such as streptococcal (respiratory) and staphylococcal (skin) infections. Mothers are advised to keep babies away from contact with people who may have these infections.

Besides, cleaning of the umbilicus is recommended with a spirit swab as it harbours bacteria.

"My bundle of joy"

As Hathi waits to go into labour, Mehta says, "The days of morning sickness and nausea were painful but looking at my small boy now, I think it was all well worth it."